Loosing perspective

So my mom informed me today that my blog  called "perspective" was blank except for one random photo. I was frustrated, shattered, devastated. I had taken lots of time writing it, plus with how frustrating my internet had been for 3 days, it all was just plain and simply...irritating.

Another factor was that i write on the fly. I don't plan and meditate and draft. i sit and put my fingers on the keyboard when a thought crosses through my brain and there it is. So I sat all afternoon pondering, what could i possibly have had perspective about? I drew a blank, the thought train had long since left the station.

Granted that at the time of trying to train my brain to trace its thought track back to the perspective station, i was also trying to book an operating theater [complete with assistant, paediatrician, aneathetist etc] for a woman who was in labour ahead of schedule but needed an urgent caesarean section.....this could have greatly hindered my ability to regain perspective on...well...perspective.

I was randomly reminded of the scripture in Hosea 4:6

  my people are destroyed from lack of knowledge.

You see when we lack direction, focus, perspective....we hit a redundant rut. We get stuck, we can't progress, and eventually its game over. its a dry, dark and devastating place to be. God has created us all with a purpose and on purpose, so being in this place goes against His plan of action....it also leads to distraction and double-mindedness.

And we all know that double-mindedness is not good....and in case we didn't know, God spells it out clearly in James 1:8 for us.

8 Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do.

I had one of those double-mindedness moments tonight. its been 3 days of intensely crazy and busy work where i barely had a chance to ...um... breathe.... so heading home tonight....friday night...i am excited at the prospect of it being weekend....and my stomach is sending signals to my brain that it is craving something.

Now my problem with cravings is that i don't always know what i am craving or what i am craving might not be available in my country.. . when in Albania i frequently craved south african cuisine. and now that i am back in SA, i crave the Mediterranean inspired cuisine of albania. we are never satisfied are we? So tonight i suspect that i am craving KFC....no wait, possibly sushi....umm....

So i stop in at a supermarket that does good, and reasonably priced sushi.....lets just say that my meal tonight looked like this.....

Yup....i really wasn't sure what i was craving, so ended up with a little bit of everything and none of it was friend or fish....go figure.... i did enjoy it though.

On the plus side i regained perspective....nope, not on life....my blog "perspective" was relocated and reposted.... and i also had a small victory....my hair was finally long enough to put up in ponytail...yay....celebrate the small victories in life....long hair here i come.