Do you all remember those cheesy
perfume / deodorant advertisements on the t.v.? Where a gorgeous girl
sprays herself with whatever the product is and then later you see
her, in a gorgeous flowy summer dress, hair glistening in the sun, a
spring in her step walking down the street and complete strangers
[guys] suddenly give her flowers or burst into song. . . and its all
so picture perfect and romantic. . . and every girl watching lets
out a despondent sigh, wishing she could have it happen to her . . .
Let me please drown this pathetic fake
romantic notion with a heady dose of reality.... IT IS NOT ROMANTIC
having guys burst into song just because you walked passed them . . .
maybe the first time its flattering but honestly, it can be a
downright nuisance. Now I know many woman who just read what I said
think I have lost it completely, and maybe the summer sun has gone to
my head a bit today. . . but let me give you a glimpse into some of
the frustration of life.
Strolling from my house to the Art
Center today, a 15 minute walk . . . dressed in shorts and t shirt, my
braids tied back and sweat staining my armpits . . . I was not the
picture of the ideal perfume advert lady. . . quite the opposite...
but let me tell you in that short amount of time I was serenaded 5
times. . . .count them... 5!!!!!
it gets a bit much after a while, I had
a guy pull up next to me in his vehicle, come to a complete stop,
blocking traffic, roll down his window and burst into song. . . I had
a swarm of 4 teen boys encircle me and start singing while I strolled
through the park etc etc. I dont think in the last 4 years I have
made it through a day without being serenaded. The simplest action
like buying bread can often have a complete stranger lean on the
counter next to you and start singing. . . and dont even get me
started on the invites to go “drink a coffee” with them. . .
especially not on the guys who are so persistent they follow you for
almost half an hour till you seek help in getting rid of them.
Welcome to being a single foreign girl
in elbasan. . . its not that I am drop dead gorgeous, and oddly
enough its not cause I dress like a super model... the once, in the
height of winter I was dressed in snowboots, a snowjacket, gloves,
scarf, jeans and a hat and someone still hit on me. . . [how they saw
there was a person under all those layers is still a mystery to
me.... but anyway] . . . the simple fact is I am different to them .
. .i am foreign and single [unchaperoned] and don't look like them and
so its their right to sing to me, flirt with me, follow me or ask me
for coffee or even pinch my butt! [or some a lot of them think]
All my daydreams of how great it would
be to feel desired just by walking down the street were shattered
because its imposing itself on you, its treating you like a piece of
meat, just an object of lust until the next one walks passed with the
aroma of romance.... its far from honoring. . . and its a bit
disconcerting to be honest.
Yes I could choose to allow myself to
be flattered by it and to feed that thing, but its false. Its not
because they have any idea of who I am or what I am about. I simply
just walked past them on the street. Its LUST not romance. I want to
challenge Christian woman out there, careful what you long for and
careful what you feed... God has so much more in store for you, only
the best and a life with TRUE LOVE not passing lust based on
appearances or because a romantic song was stuck in their brain as
you walked passed them or because you smelled like roses!
I have to constantly put my blinkers on
and tune out to the world as I walk down the street. . . choosing to
remain PURE because my PURITY came at a great cost, His Blood!
Choosing not to entertain the flesh and its lusts, but to remain true
to who He created me to be. . . I had a random memory this morning,
from my first “slow dance” as a christian.
I will share it here, because it is
humorous
but also it is a loud statement . . . I was a baby
christian, a few weeks old in the faith. . . I was only 15 years old.
. . the youth held a Valentines dance. . . and I chose an older,
christian friend to go with. . . handsome he was indeed with long
brown hair and dark brown eyes. . . so I got all dressed up. . . [I
wont describe my outfit cause it was just after the 80's hit and our
fashion mishaps are best left forgotten.] so we had a great night
together, dancing in a group, snacking from the table etc... and then
the lights dimmed and it was time for a couple dance... again
unrealistic romantic notions run through your mind of the joy of
dancing with such a handsome man.... and as he led me to the dance
floor I will never forget the song.... it was from DC Talk and the
song was. . . “what if I stumble?”
enough said.
Keep your focus on reality! Keep your
heart PURE. Walking in repentance and holiness... because sin
crouches at the door . . .and its too easy to fall.
Philippians 4: 8
Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - think about such things.
a quote from A.W.Tozer
"sin will always take your further than you wanted to go, keep you longer than you wanted to stay and cost you more than you wanted to pay!"
YES! i might be 33 . . . but i can honestly tell you that as each day, week, month, year go by . . . i become more and more a daddy's girl.... he has me wrapped around his little finger. [though i think my mom might say its the other way around.]
My dad and i have not always seen eye to eye or held the same beliefs or opinions... but one thing i can always rely on is his support. . . 100%! i know my dad has my back. i never have to doubt it. i am so grateful because many times i am embarking on what appear to be crazy notions, like giving up a job to go to bible college or packing my bags to move to a foreign nation and even if things go south, i dont get a "i told you so" ... i get a shoulder to lean on.
Daddy . . . the road wasnt always easy, we werent always close... but over the years we have forged a strong bond which i wouldnt exchange for the world. . . from dancing together at my Matric Dance, to dancing together in the kitchen the one time i was sick, while you sang to me. [yes i was in my 20's already but you are never too old to dance with your daddy] . . . to the sweet gestures, literally, like the occasional chocolate left on my pillow case.... to encouraging me to keep on keeping on when things get tough as i follow my dreams.... to giving me advice on what you would want for me in a husband. . . and so many more memories... for the laughter and hugs.... and the crazy blue hat of yours which is as much a part of the family and all our memories as we are.... for always calling me your sunshine!
